If your just tuning in you may want to catch up on this two part blog by reading the post from earlier this week down below or by clicking Body Language Part I.
Today I’m going to talk about some body language signals you can learn to recognize in others and consciously use to change the way people perceive you (and stop fights before they happen).
Before we jump in let me explain the importance of this. Predators and bullies (two of the three types of attackers you will come across) almost always chose as their targets by singling out people who they don’t think will put up a fight (i.e. people giving off submissive body language signals).
The good news is there are some very simple steps you can take that will ensure you are perceived as an alpha male (someone they have no interest in messing with). These techniques will help keep you and your family safe, and the best part is you don’t have to get into a fight.
This is fight prevention at its best, and it doesn’t include backing out of a fight (bullies and predators simply won’t want to fight you). Enough chatter, let’s get into this stuff.
Non-Verbal/Body Language Signals That Will Convey Dominance and Stop Fights From Happening
- Neutralized expression:
- This is most easily explained as a poker face. This doesn’t mean you can’t smile or show disapproval, but be in control. You should never indicate your emotions to someone unless you decide to do it consciously.
- Dominant Eye Movement:
- When conversing with someone maintain eye contact while you are speaking and make less eye contact while they are speaking.
- The ideal ratio is to look at a person’s eyes 55% of the time while you are talking and 45% of the time while they are talking. This conveys dominance (this is not the right ratio for friends or loved ones; this is strictly to convey dominance to an unfamiliar group or individual).
- Also never look down after looking at someone looks at you, this is a submissive eye movement.
- Dominant Body Position:
- Stand squared up to someone you are talking to. This means your feet and shoulders face them
- Lean slightly in toward a person while talking and straighten while listening (when I say lean forward I don’t mean get into their face, this will cause not avoid a fight). The lean-in is subtle. For example if there is a chair between you and another person put a foot on the chair and while you are talking lean in resting your elbow on your raised knee, when he is talking straighten back up.
- When talking to someone stand a little closer than you think is comfortable, an alpha male isn’t concerned with other people’s space (again this doesn’t mean getting into someone’s face, subtlety is crucial).
- When you walk into a room pause for a minute and look around, check out the scene.
- When you are sitting with a group of people don’t be afraid to rest your arm behind someone else at the booth, again alpha males aren’t afraid of taking up space.
- Dominant Posture:
- This seems very similar to the body position except these are things you should do even if nobody is talking to you.
- Keep your back straight and head forward while sitting or standing.
- Think of a military posture. However you should not look tense, keep your shoulders relaxed (a shoulders-up posture indicates fear and anxiety…definitely not alpha male characteristics)
Wow…I thought I would be able to get through all of this stuff in one post, but apparently not. I’m only about half way through the list. I’m going to have to continue this into next week. Go ahead and try some of these tips this weekend. Not only will you be much less likely to get into a fight or be targeted by predators, but you should also notice a big difference in the way people interact with you (especially women…who are highly attracted to alpha males). Anyways try it out and come back for more tips next week.
Stay Smart and Stay Safe,